It’s the dream of every parent who loves and cares for his/her children to see his/her children grow into responsible persons. That’s why parents struggle and work hard to ensure that his/her child is safe and goes to a good school that will nurture and mold his behavior and earns him/her a successful career in life.
However, what some parents fail to understand is that their parenting styles pose significant impacts on the child’s behavior. Some will blame some behavioral responses to the school, a specific teacher, or peers, ignoring the fact that some undesired behaviors are mainly sourced from parenting experience that the child has been exposed to.
Research has coined the development of juvenile delinquent behaviors to poor parenting styles. While it’s not possible to be a perfect all-around parent, it’s advisable to always try to be the best possible. This article highlights how specific parenting styles evoke delinquency in children and possible solutions.
Contents
Over-protective parenting style
Overprotective parents are mostly concerned about the goodies of the child, and protect their children against any forms of reprimand or punishment for mistakes done. Sometimes, such a parent may deny his/her child’s involvement in a certain awful incident, even in presence of incriminating evidence.
Consequently, the child will grow up liberally and unrestrained, thinking that s/he is in control and is free to do whatever s/he likes. Eventually, such a child may become spoilt, believing that s/he can have his/her way in everything. Such a child can then utter harsh words to his/her elders or peers without fear or remorse.
An authoritarian parent is micromanaging, rigid, inflexibility and gives structured rules to his/her child. They are highly controlling and less or not receptive to their children’s preferences. Authoritarian parents are also cold, harsh and often resort to corporal punishment rather than nurture desirable traits in their children. A slight mistake will lead to spanking without giving room for self-explanation or giving instructions on how things should be done.
This overtly strict parenting style will elicit negative responses to the child. For instance, at onset of adolescence, a child who was denied freedom might become rebellious in pursuit of autonomy, liberty and enjoyment of freedom of choice, just like his/her peers. S/he is likely to be defiant, rebellious and defiant of any regulations, treating them as possible tormenters or counteractive to his/her pursuit of personal space.
Neglectful parenting style
Parental neglect may come as a result of long-time travel or lack of work-life balance which see parents having too little time with their children. As a result, the parent may miss the opportunity to instill responsible behaviors due to lack of monitoring and nurturing. Children of neglect may thus fall astray into irresponsible behavioral tendencies due to lack of behavioral shaping, a critical role uniquely played by the parent. Sometimes, these children are left in the hands of foster families where they might suffer as victims of abuse. As they grow, these children might become conscious of maltreatment, and become rebellious or delinquent.
After a long period of parental neglect, the children might become emotionally disconnected from their parents, especially if they receive the best treatment from their foster caregivers. They thus might be unwilling to go back to their parents, and if forced to, they might turn defiant or deviant to words the parents in protest.
Permissive parenting
Permissive parenting style is characterized by giving the child more than adequate freedom. The parent plays the loving type, which in many cases leads the child into the spoilt type. A permissive parent might avoid conflict with the child, and will not give strict rules or guidelines. If rules are there, they are inconsistent. As such the parent will not care to correct the child, but allow for mistakes to slide without taking action that will make the child feel responsible or note that s/he did anything wrong. In other words, permissive parents treat their children as delicate and do not expect mature behavior from them despite their age. The parents treat the child as a friend rather than make him/her see a parental figure in them.
The consequences of permissive parenting include defiance and juvenile delinquency. Since the child does not recognize the authority in his/her parent, s/he becomes hostile whenever given instructions by any adults. Such a child is likely to become rebellious in other areas/settings where s/he not treated ‘special’ just like home by his parents.
Possible solutions
Juvenile delinquency can be dangerous to the child and those close to him/her. A delinquent child might put the parent to shame, join criminal gangs or cause harm to other people without remorse. As a parent, you may have to bear the cost of damages committed by your delinquent child. It’s thus important to inculcate good behavior in your children, as this might save them from various costly repercussions.
- Nurture responsibility
Always ensure that your children feel responsible for the outcomes of their actions. Appraise positive outcomes and correct them when they fail.
- Punish and/or condemn bad behavior
It’s not advisable to allow the child to do whatever s/he wants. Always make them know and recognize their wrongs and avoid repeating the wrongs in the future.
- Be a listener
Give your child an opportunity to explain themselves. Sometimes they may be not directly responsible for particular faults, or they may have done their best to avoid the mistake. Being unapproachable to the kids creates a rift between you and them, which may make it difficult for them to seek your support.
- Avoid consistent corporal punishments
Avoid being too harsh and giving corporal punishment to the child for mistakes done. Instead, treat their mistakes as opportunities to edify or nurture better behaviors in them. If children learn to associate mistakes with corporal punishment, they are likely to run away or deny their involvement, which are both elements of delinquency.
- Be there
Ensure you have enough time with your children. Take the chance of any day off, holiday or timeout to familiarize yourself with your children’s progress and behavior, and to nurture them.
Learn more on this topic here.
Last Updated on September 19, 2021